Pardon my Biden: Drones Over America 2.0

Waiting for the punchline

Joe Biden’s presidency should be treated as some kind of practical joke played on the American people. A cognitively challenged senior citizen, clearly unqualified for the role he was hired to play. Mumbling incoherently, inventing conflicting whoppers about his past, looking to “Dr. Jill” to literally guide him around the stage.

Like leading men who gravitate to character actors as they age, Biden went from war loving, police loving “neoliberal” to the “Woke” monstrosity we’ve come to know and love. He was never the kind of “liberal” that I would been attracted to in my misguided, ACLU-card carrying youth. Ironically, while virtue signaling more than all the previous presidents combined did over the past two hundred plus years, Biden left behind some truly racist remarks on the record. While rightly opposing busing in 1977, the young politician declared that he didn’t want his children to grow up in a “racial jungle.” During his doddering, shaking hands with empty air stage, Biden remarked that “poor kids are just as bright and just as talented as White kids.” If Donald Trump had said that, the cries of “Excuseeee Me!” would still be echoing across the fruited plain.

Joe Biden has some remarkable personal baggage. I mean, what other national figure has ever been caught even one time, on videotape, touching little girls inappropriately? Lustfully sniffing their hair? Whispering sweet nothings in their ears? Rubbing their undeveloped chests? Now, to be fair, he has also touched adult women inappropriately, if that makes anyone feel any better. And, of course, there is that whole uncomfortable showers with his daughter Ashley thing, which she- not any “White Supremacist”- credits for her promiscuity and drug addiction. That’s a record not many politicians can boast about. Not many behind bars for similar offenses can match it, either. But the state controlled media isn’t interested. At all. Instead, they keep harping on Trump’s locker room “grab ‘em by the pussy” comment. Or photos of young Ivanka on his lap. How perverted; a father with his little girl sitting on his lap.

There is so much not to love about the Biden presidency. The continuous blame being placed on White people, who still cling to a precarious majority of the population. What does it say about your society when a White leader issues blanket condemnations of the largest demographic group in the country? Who are no Whiter than he is. “White Supremacy” represents the “greatest threat to democracy?” Biden’s Lenin-style speech, with a backdrop of suitably Bolshevik red lighting, is the antithesis to JFK’s June, 1963 American University “peace” speech, the greatest ever delivered by any American president, in my view. Biden’s frightening, Soviet theatrics, conversely, would represent the worst speech ever delivered by a president. And considering how many awful speeches our presidents have delivered just over the past fifty years, that’s really saying something.

We’ll always have those skyrocketing price increases to remember. Who doesn’t want to pay more for food and gas, when “democracy” is at stake? If we complain about that, then the “White Supremacists” will win. Or maybe it’s the “conspiracy theorists” that will win. I get confused. I don’t know what they’re scared of; it’s not like either the “White Supremacists” or “conspiracy theorists” have ever won anything. Well, White men did pretty well in past centuries. Although there is little evidence that many of them openly proclaimed their supremacy. Who can forget the initial lack of response to those devastated by Hurricane Helene? Or the earlier failure to even visit the residents of East Palestine, Ohio? How many times did this feeble man contract COVID? How many boosters did he have? And his Supreme Court nominee, Kentanji Brown Jackson, whose qualification was her Blackness, who can’t define a woman.

Biden’s financial commitment to the tin pot dictatorship in Ukraine was another highlight of his term in office. Sure, he renamed some “racist” roads, as part of his “Build Back Better” plan, which didn’t seem to have involved much building, and made nothing better. But it was his unswerving loyalty to the former comedian/actor turned crisis actor Voldomyr Zelenskyy that really made his presidency memorable. Well, actually it was taxpayer loyalty. We’re the ones who paid the trillions, or whatever it was. By the way, why is there confusion about the spelling of Zelenskyy’s last name? Does it have two “ys” at the end? It’s not as confounding as the myriad of spellings of Muammar Qadaffi/Kaddafi/Gaddafi, but it is perplexing that there isn’t a consistent spelling of a renowned world leader’s last name. The guy can play the piano with his penis, for goodness sakes. Where is the respect?

Now, Biden was the victim of a silent coup, following his debate with Donald Trump. All of his die hard defenders, who’d insisted that he was sharp as a tack, and that it was “disinformation” to suggest otherwise, abruptly determined that he was indeed what all those “conspiracy theorists” had said he was; an obvious victim of dementia, or something similar. A victim of elder abuse. At any rate, he was unceremoniously cast aside, using a ridiculous document that wasn’t on White House stationary, and a signature that didn’t match his. He clearly wasn’t on board with stepping down, and was later filmed trying on a MAGA hat. Dr. Jill certainly wasn’t happy about it. She’d experienced the limelight, and she liked it. Well, let’s be honest- it’s hard not to like the limelight when you receive the kind of fawning press coverage that she did. Melania Trump would be totally justified in feeling otherwise.

Like all presidents, Biden granted pardons as his days in office winded down. It was predictable that he would pardon his troubled son Hunter. It was just as predictable that the kept press would approve of it. But did he really have to pardon corrupt judge Michael Conahan, who was convicted of receiving millions in bribes for giving excessive sentences to juvenile offenders, and funneling them to private, for profit detention centers, in what came to be known as the Kids for Cash scandal? It may not have spawned an annoying jingle like Kars for Kids, but it was reprehensible, criminal activity. Why would the cuddly Joe Biden, well known lover of ice cream and “democracy,” decide to pardon that guy? It’s very similar to how Trump pardoned the president of Death Row Records, at the behest of his pal Snoop Dogg, who had joked about Trump being assassinated. But not Julian Assange or Edward Snowden.

Among some of Biden’s other pardons were a woman who ripped off taxpayers for $53 million in the largest fraud in U.S. history, an Indian-American doctor who defrauded cancer patients, and a Chinese man who generated millions of pages of child pornography on the internet. Preemptive pardons for Deep State criminals like Hillary Clinton and Anthony Fauci have supposedly been seriously discussed. This, of course, is exactly the kind of pardon that many Trump supporters wanted him to issue for everyone at the Stop the Steal Rally on January 6, 2021. But, to give him a little credit, in 2022 Biden did pardon Abraham Bolden, the first Black Secret Service agent, who was punished for telling the truth about the Secret Service and the JFK assassination. That was more justifiable than any of Trump’s pardons.

And while Biden ruminates, or rather someone ruminates for him, over other unworthy people that he can pardon, the skies of New Jersey are suddenly filled with drones. It’s like we’re back in 1938, and Orson Welles is broadcasting a fake radio program about aliens invading earth. You know, based on War of the Worlds by prolific science fiction author and zealous advocate of world government H.G. Wells. They say that Charlie Chaplin’s lover, actress Paulette Goddard, was so irrationally smitten by the elderly Wells that she literally chased him around a house or something. Not sure how the comely young actress could have had difficulty catching the old socialist geezer, but that’s the legend. Maybe I’m just jealous. New Jersey residents are understandably alarmed, much as Americans in 1938 listening to Welles’s Halloween broadcast were. Not sure if they’re jumping out of buildings, like they did in 1938.

At any rate, these drones just suddenly appeared, like a Chinese spy balloon, in American airspace. And that’s about all we know. Seriously. The government says they don’t know what they are, or who sent them. But there is nothing to worry about. Sure, that sounds reasonable. Is this the beginning of the fake alien invasion we’ve all been waiting for? Project Bluebeam? Maybe they’ll just tell us that it’s the “new normal” for unidentified drones to be flying over us. UFOs have been mainstreamed, after all. It’s cool to talk about them now. Too bad for all the suckers who saw them sixty years ago, and had their lives ruined when they reported it. Are the drones just really low alien tech? UFOs could do some amazing things, according to witnesses who were soundly ridiculed for saying it. The Jersey drones seem to be pretty similar to our own, garden variety, boring drones. I wouldn’t worry. It’s probably no big deal.

Some have laughably suggested that the drones are connected to Iran. So, in addition to being the “state sponsor of terrorism,” this backwards country is now capable of sending a fleet of drones to our shores? Wasn’t it enough that they somehow got Trump’s entire Secret Service detail, not to mention local law enforcement, to stand down completely during the assassination attempt in Butler, Pennsylvania? No wonder Israel is so concerned about them. They are an even bigger “threat to democracy” than your average, USDA, domestic “insurrectionist.” Homeland Security head Alejandro Mayorkas explains that more people are flying drones at night. Sorry, I don’t listen to someone who tried to characterize parents expressing their frustration at school board meetings as “domestic terrorists.” Donald Trump declares, “something strange is going on.” He’ll get to the bottom of it. It’s probably Iran.

I really hope Elon Musk turns his DOGE attention on the Military Industrial Complex. I don’t know, but I really think that the biggest, most expensive national defense system the world has ever known probably ought to be able to determine what kinds of heretofore unseen craft are suddenly littering our skies. It’s like it’s 9/11 all over again, and wild-eyed terrorists are flying planes all over the place for ninety minutes, including one headed straight for the Pentagon. And the authorities with that massive defense system at their disposal do absolutely nothing. Well, except probably shooting down a plane over Shanksville, Pennsylvania and lying about it. It’s a stand down thing, you wouldn’t understand. Then again, the authorities really hesitated to do anything with that dastardly Chinese spy balloon, too. They let it fly, really slowly, over several states, before it was finally shot down over South Carolina.

What if that Chinese spy balloon had been loaded with some kind of special disinformation nuclear weapon? You know, the kind that the diabolical Vladimir Putin is so renowned for. What if these New Jersey drones contain nuclear disinformation? Imagine what they would do to the trusting souls in New Jersey, calmly watching their reality shows and sports. What if they’re “White Supremacist” drones? Those are the worst kind. You just can’t trust them. What would become of America 2.0 if Whites stopped apologizing for nothing? Ask Caitlin Clark. The most popular athlete in the world, captured like a political prisoner by Time magazine, and forced to recant her “White Privilege,” and promise to help “elevate Black women.” She literally lost much, if not most, of her extensive fan base by going “Woke.” Maybe she was hit by a special BLM drone. I’m sure George Soros would fund it.

My guess is that these mysterious drones will never be identified. They’ll just eventually stop talking about them. Like the Trump assassination attempts. Or the official Epstein list. Are they still talking about the Diddy parties? Sorry, I just wouldn’t go to a party given by somebody calling himself “Diddy.” Out of principle. You have to stand for something, and that’s just a really stupid name. Very uncool, no matter how many times Justin Bieber was raped there. The shelf life of these stories is very limited. Remember the blood stained subterranean, secret tunnels under the New York synagogue? Or the still unexplained death of Thomas Massie’s wife? Or Anthony Weiner’s laptop, that supposedly portrayed Hillary Clinton doing unspeakable things to a little child? Where do all these stories go? Flushed down the American Memory Hole, to get in a shameless book plug. Oceana has always been at war with Eurasia.

So Joe Biden will leave office in disgrace. Just kidding. Sure, he should leave in disgrace, as a national embarrassment. But he won’t. Eventually, the court historians will assess him far more kindly than he deserves. That’s what they do. Give credit where it isn’t due. Look at Lincoln, and FDR, and Wilson. The three most disastrous presidents we’ve ever had, but the court historians rank them as the best. Like our corrupt government, and the “journalists” in the state controlled mainstream media, they lie about everything. Read my hidden history books if you don’t believe me. They literally are allergic to the truth, much as a vampire must avoid the sunlight. The truth is never going to set them free. Joe Biden will get a lucrative pension, and almost certainly live a long life. All the presidents do now. And the First Ladies. It’s one of the many wonders of our cherished democracy.